A Little Something Fun

So...it came to my attention recently that someone shot video footage from my band's most recent holiday "reunion" show...and of course, I had to check it out. Keep in mind, it's live and we hadn't played together for a year prior to the show, because Rach lives in OREGON :) but I still think it came out ok. We had an awesome time playing, which is really what mattered most to me.

If you're interested, pop over to THIS LINK to see our little page, and check out the video of us playing live. The featured song, "Yellow Fields" is one where my bandmate, Rachel, does most of the singing (we alternate song-writing and lead vocal duties). Give it a listen! It's one of our slower, chill songs that builds to a bigger finish, so hang with it. And check out how sexy I am on stage. Haha. J/k. Always weird to see yourself when you didn't necessarily know you were being filmed. If you like what you hear, you can listen to some of our other songs on our other lil page HERE or HERE.

Oh yeah, and go Alice!

Rock Star for a Night

Sorry I've been out of touch! Friday night bot Scott and I had "reunion" shows with our old bands, so we traveled up to Saint Joseph (only an hour away from Kansas City), to play some music. We took Ev and checked into the downtown hotel, dropped her off at Scott's mom's house, then dolled up and prepped for our night.

I took a loooonnng bath and spent way too long on my hair and makeup just because I could. Then I got all psyched up and went down to the venue to kick the party off. We did a sound check and then hung about, I drank some cocktail concoction with orang juice and chocolate vodka--sounds weird but tastes yummy!

Then we played, and let me tell you--I loved it. At first I was nervous because, well, being on stage is so different from my day to day life and I was worried about getting the parts right. But as soon as we dove in, I forgot all about that and just enjoyed playing and singing and doing my thing. 

We had a pretty decent crowd of old friends, fans, and random peeps who wandered in. Lots of fellow musicians and hippie-types, which was sweet. We passed out kazoos and squirt guns and bubbles (curtesy of Santa and the Dollar Tree), and made it a big party.

Meanwhile, a block away, my hubby Scott rocked out with his old band to a huge crowd (his crowd seemed a little more neck-tatoo, I might fight you types). It was awesome watching him do his thing up there--Scott is an amazing performer and he was straight up getting it with his moves and his stage presence. After watching for a bit, I had to literally run back to my venue to close with a second set, then we picked the girl up from Grandmas and slept at the hotel. 

It was a busy/crazy/awesome night, and it did us both some good to feel like we were rockin, even if just for one night. 

PS: Christmas posts to come!

Playing a Show...After a One Year Hiatus

Well, folks, I've just finalized plans to play a show on December 23rd with Alice. Rachel is coming back to town for the holidays, and we were like "um, how bout playing a show?".....so it's settled. We're playing at The Rendezvous in Saint Joseph, MO (Rachel's hometown) on December 23rd...mark your calendars :)

I guess I'm feeling a mix of really really excited and totally freaking out. Here's the deal--I LOVE the stage. Love performing. Period. I started singing in church when I was like...4, then graduated to plays, orchestra, band, small groups, cheerleading, dance...basically anything that involved music + standing on a stage with lights on you followed by applause. I love it. Being in a band so perfect for me, because the band started after a period of me doing singer/songwriter stuff and not knowing where to take it. I was 22 and had just graduated college with 6 months left on my lease and no plan. What better thing to do than to bartend and start a band? My parents were worried. But I stuck with the band even when I got my first "real job"...stuck with it even when I was in night school to get my MA. Heck, I stuck with it when I was living in a different city and when I was pregnant and nauseous and sleepy.

But at this current time? It's been almost a year since I last performed. And that includes karaoke night at the hole in the wall bar we love. Sure, I sing Yo Gabba Gabba songs and The Wheels on the Bus all the time to an audience of one. I've even busted out the guitar a few times for Ev, but stopped after she insisted on grabbing at the strings. Do I even remember these songs? How to play the bass? The electric guitar? How to be awesome on stage? How to take enough time out of my week to practice? These questions may not be answered right away.

Being a mom and being a rock star (even if it's on a really small level where you're just giggin locally and playing shows for your friends) do not instinctively go together. I'm already thinking about childcare and how this even fits in to our move and what I'm going to wear and where we'll stay the night and so on. I'm a mom, guys. Let's hope I can still rock, because let's face it---I could use a few applause.

The Curse of Creativity

Any of you who are creative, or have creative loved ones probably know what I'm talking about. There are good weeks and bad. Times when it feels like a blessing and times when it feels like a curse.

I guess I consider myself to be creative, primarily because I have a passion for music (writing, singing, playing, listening, watching, everything). Plus I've always felt sort of weird/different from other people, which I think tends to be an underlying theme for creative peeps everywhere.

Being weird only becomes cool when you hit about 16 and figure out that there are hair cuts and outfits that can help facilitate your weirdness into coolness, and other large groups of people who are also, quote "weird", and some of those people are people you think are amazing. I took my teenage weirdness and poured it into wearing adventurous clothing, writing music, and obsessing over all things "underground". I no longer have the time or the desire to spend hours researching new hipper, less-heard-of bands, or to hit up 6 thrift stores in a day looking for my next vintage find or old prom dress to cut up.

But I DO sometimes wish I had time to write more, to read more, to play more music, to PERFORM (have I mentioned that I pretty much adore performing?). Between work, school, and being a mommy, I really have negative time left to devote to this right now. My recent run- in with a new potential band-mate led to a "discussion" by my husband and I, in which he basically reminded me that I chose mommyhood as my permanent extracurricular for the next several years. That I might really not have 2 extra hours a week to do something new musically until Evie's older. That I should understand this and accept it and not be frustrated by it, because you can't always have it all. Don't get me wrong--I would trade all the music in the world for my beautiful, healthy baby girl any day of the week. I'm just struggling to find that balance still as an artist.

My husband, Scott, is a painter and also a musician, and it's an ongoing struggle for him to be super dad and still find the time needed to be a productive artist. Most days, it results in us high-fiving each other as we tag the other one in. He watches the baby while I work. I come home for lunch every day to feed her while he showers or tidies up the house. I go back to work. When I get home, I watch Ev and he leaves to go to his studio and paint, do homework, or work his part time night job. He spend his days with Everleigh, while I spend my nights with her. On weekends, I either have class (in which case he watches her) or I don't (in which case I watch her and he tries to play catch-up on his homework and paintings). While we do spend some happy, lazy evenings together as family, it seems like more often than not we're parenting relay style.

What's the solution? Some day I will finish my Play Therapy Certification and he will complete his degree. Life will be less complicated. But there will always be work and there will always be this energy that drives us to create. And babies only stay little for a split second.

For now, I guess I'll try to focus that energy into my most amazing creation to date.

PS: Just as I finished writing this, I received a text from Scott that made my eyes well up: "Ev and I are having a good afternoon so why don't you take some grown up time for yourself when you get off work? Luv!" Man, I'm lucky.

Busytown

Wow! Sorry It's been sooooooo long since I updated my blog :( As some of you know, I recently started a new and exciting job, which is awesome. However, I had to go through some all-day trainings last week that really cut into my blogging time ;)

I am back with a vengeance, so look out!

Last week lots of exciting things happened:

•  Everleigh started clapping her hands, which seems very fancy and generally makes me feel like I'm entertaining her with my every action
• I attended my Play Therapy Certification class, and learned a lot about diagnosing children and how it kind of sucks but is a necessary evil in our current system.
• I went to my preggo girlfriend's baby shower, hung out with other moms, and watched her unwrap THREE new Boppies. Wa wa wa. PS: One was from me. Thank goodness for gift receipts.
• I took Evie to visit a bud who just had a homebirth (she is awesome) surprise baby GIRL. Since her Intelligender test had said "Boy", almost all of her baby stuff  was either specifically boyish or gender neutral with boyish tendencies, so Ev told me it was OK to pass along her super girly NB-6mo collection ;) Can I pause for moment here and say that no matter how well you think you remember, seeing a newborn baby is always surprising! They are SOOOO tiny and snuggly and amazing.
• I attended my first chics-only Happy Hour since before I was pregnant and had a blast
• While there, I met a super awesome little lady who plays music and has an artist husband and a little girl. She wants to start a band!
• I went over to my new music-buddie's house and jammed :) while our kiddos played
• My stepdaughter, T, got to come for a visit and hang with Miss Evie.
• We ate at a really weird, poorly lit, gross Chinese buffet that made us all feel funny
• I got some actual for real SLEEP (thank God). Little E decided to treat me to 5 1/2 hours of uninterrupted bliss, followed by another 3-4 hours of tossing and turning. I'll take it.

Hmm...I know there's more, but that's the gist. Hope you all have had a great past week! I'd love to hear about it :)

Now this is the story all about how....

Now for something less deep, and I mean a lot less.

I've had the Fresh Prince of Bel-air theme song stuck in my head all morning ("In West Philadelphia born and raised, on the playground is where I spent most of my days..." Come on. you know you know it). I'd really like to make the bad man stop so I'm searching for new tunes while also trying to work on contracts for my job. Have I mentioned before that I pretty much suck at multi-tasking and yet I still keep trying?

What else, what else. This past weekend I took Everleigh trick or treating with my big sis and her 5 year old Batman. This was a bit of a last minute decision, and it was super cold here in old Missouri that night, so I put her in her Halloween onesie with the orange tutu, a giant rediculous hairbow, and her warmest snuggliest coat. And for good measure I painted her face like a kitty. Except then she got hungry and wanted to nurse and it all rubbed off on my boobs. Good times. Regardless, we had fun and she seemed to enjoy looking at all the other kiddos. People were so happy to open their doors and see her little mug staring back :) Win-win.

Right now my old band, Alice www.myspace.com/aliceband is trying to get a holiday show together because Rachel's coming back from Eugene, OR for Christmas. The thought of getting back on stage and jamming with my buds makes me so happy it's silly. I hope it works out. I can't wait until Evie is older and she can come see us play at outdoor shows and stuff. I wonder what she'll look like? I wonder what kind of music I'll be making then? I wonder a lot of things! My hubby and I are currently working on a duo project that's a bit alt-country lo-fi called Moonhead. We've been sort of working on it for a long time, but would like to get it together and put some songs out there for people to enjoy. More to come on that!

Just had to cleanse my palet from yesterday's heavy post and let you all in on some of the light aspects of my life! PS: Everleigh Halloween pics to follow later today.

Hope everyone's having a smashing little Wednesday!

Finding the Beat

I've been singing and performing since I was teeny-tiny. It was just something I always dug, whether it was a performance in my shower, in my mom's van, in front of the fireplace, at church (as a kid), or on a stage--once I got the bug I was hooked. Call it a middle-child phenomena, but I felt a strong draw to do stuff in front of people that would later be rewarded with applause. This carried over into sports, dance, competative speech, vocal performances, and later as a teen and young adult into being in a band.
I first decided I wanted to be in a band when my 14 year old ears heard Veruca Salt pumping through the audio system of my friend's cool older sister's car. I knew right then that being in a band was the shit and I needed to make it happen. So yeah--just start a band right? No problem right? WRONG.
The dilema was as follows: I only played violin (which is really hard to play and sing at the same time) and the only guitar players I knew were boys. Did any of these said boys want to be in a band with a chick singer? They did not. They wanted to sound like Metalica.

And so it began. Frustrated by this initial setback, I decided if no one would play guitar for me, I would be my own hero and learn. Peice of cake right? Wrong. I begged my dad to hook me up with an acoustic I could practice on. This request was met with a big fat no, seeing as how most of my siblings had tried their hands at various instruments only to later discard them. My parents had an awesome collection of unplayed instruments going and were not about to add to the pile.

So I did what any poor teen would do--begged, borrowed and stole (not really). I borrowed a friend's guitar and learned some basic chords. I learned that D,C,A,and E could get you pretty far. After a year of borrowing from a friend, my dad finally came around and bought me some yard sale find. I practiced on that thing constantly, finding the chord--then singing a line, the pausing to find the next chord and singing the next line. It was a slow and frustrating process which made me like it even more. I WILL tackle this.

I wrote some songs with the help of my ex-boyfriend (a brilliant writer and poet). I started playing some open mics at local bars (I was under 21 but most let me in just to play), and coffee shops in town.

I recorded these songs for free with some recording engineer students at college. Upon hearing my project, the recording teacher asked to record me. Things were looking up.
I jammed for awhile with a female bass player, an awesome classical guitarist, and the recording teacher as my drummer. It just made me thirsty for more. The group was fun and interesting but no one wanted to call it a "band". This frustrated me.

Enter Rachel. I had a super awesome bud named Rachel who also played acoustic guitar at a local coffee shop in town. We would sometimes sing backup for each other at these open mics. Finally, a kindred spirit! Another girl who plays music and writes music and is constantly compared to Jewel just because no one can think of any other singer/songwriters to compare you to!

We decided over Christmas break one year to make a go of it and start a band. Since Rachel knew more chords than me on guitar, I was the designated bass player. Rachel's roommate had owned a bass for awhile and never learned to play it (I think this was where our bass came from?). Alice was born. We started writing songs that made us laugh. Then we started writing some seriously artistic stuff. We got an awesome drummer.

We continued to play at bars and outdoor shows and small festivals. We got better. And during all this time, I graduated, got a "real" job, got married, got pregnant, moved an hour away. Rachel got sick of hicktown MO and finally decided to hit the road with her man and move to Eugene OR. And Alice went on a hiatus.

So now that things are settling down a bit with the baby and I'm trying to find my own beat again, where does it all leave me musically? My goal was never to be famous. I always knew music would be a part of me forever and fanticized about singing jazz in my 50's and 60's. I always felt that it would be there for me whenever I needed it.

But you know what? I miss it. I don't just miss playing, I miss the stage. I miss performing. I miss being challenged creatively and collaborating. I miss Rachel and I miss Alice.

So where does this leave me? I guess I can always wait until Everleigh's old enough to play and start a band with her :P There's no real point to this. I'm just really greiving the loss of something that was never mine to own in the first place. Maybe it's time to blow the dust off the baby Martin and grab a new song by the short and curlies.

PS: You can check out my old band Alice here: www.myspace.com/aliceband